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THE XENA E-XINE
Volume I, Issue 10 -- May 29, 2000
Editor's note: This little incursion into Missydom is merely a prelude to a Miss, a preview of coming attractions, a promissory note, a mere foreshadowing of what we hope will be a dedicated future issue worthy of its subject.
Today's issue includes:
1. Feature Article -- "The Greatest Good (or Please, Sir, I want
some moreof the Alpha Bard Soup; a Dual First-Person Account)"
2. Lowered Expectations Training
3. Xena quote/Dar & Kerry Joke
4. Featured FanFic and Short Review -- Conqueror; Campfire Chat
5. Xena News -- "Australia's Channel 10 Pulls XWP Once Again"
6. Featured Xena Website -- Merwolf's Cave
7. Xena: Warrior Princess Episode Guide --"Cradle of Hope,"
"Path Not Taken"
8. Feedback (Response from Steve Sears! and his fans)
9. PRIVACY/NO SPAM POLICY!
10. Subscribe/Unsubscribe Information
11. Credits
12. Archives
Shameless Advertising
CDs
Original TV Soundtrack "Xena: Warrior Princess - Lyre, Lyre..." -- This
item will be released around June 13, 2000 (but you never know).
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B00004T9VK/thexenaexine
1) Featured Article
| "The Greatest Good
(or Please, Sir, I want some more of the Alpha Bard Soup; a Dual First-Person
Account)" by Lady Adrell (The Traveling Goddess) & E.J. Rain (The Sedentary Bardess) May 27, 2000 |
| Lady Adrell writes: When I first read Missy's Dar/Kerry series, I was blown away by how the characters jumped out at me. I soon found myself immersed in their world, their lives with no will to escape. With the Pack, I found a community within a community of people who not only loved X:WP, not only loved subtext, but ALSO loved Missy and her writing. I've been fortunate enough to meet some of the best people since the time I became a pup back in December 1999. I now have friends that I know I will have for a long time to come, as well as my soulmate. There are different accounts just like this of love being found through the Merwolfpack. I count myself lucky to be among such |
wonderful people who love what I love and
who willingly and lovingly pull everyone into the pack. We have Missy and Xena to thank
for that. Now that Missy will be writing an ep for Xena, we have to look forward to a leap
back to good writing. We've missed out on almost a full season due to bad writing so
knowing that Missy will at least be writing one ep gives me hope that next season could at
least give us back Good writing even if they don't give us back subtext.
|
| Missy's grand canon, but when I signed up
for pup duty I did not expect to find a soulmate friend right here in my own hometown as
well. Idly checking the directory one night to see if there were any pups in my home
state, I was shocked to see my obscure little berg as the first thing that appeared on
screen...but, hey, that's not my name! Thank you, endlessly, for this added bonus, Missy.
Sigh, I wish you'd started writing twenty years ago...] Well, she's certainly prolific, verbose, I could see right away. But isshe any, well...Good? Is it maintext or erotica or gen fic? Yes. I started reading, from the top, got hooked, and a baker's dozen Xena novels later, plus three (and counting) superb uber Xena novels (the Dar & Kerry saga, the best uber this side of a parallel dimension), Melissa Good has become the all-time champ. Not only of an on-going multi-tapestried mythos of high-quality adventure storytelling, but of 'lesbian lit.' She is the Bard of Bardesses, the Mother of All Bards. Nobody does it better. It has to be Good to be parlayed into a second career as a professional novelist and scenarist. No one is more deserving. If a poll were taken of who the online xenaverse community would most love to see write for the show the answer would've surprised no one. By now it is no |
| secret that this has come to pass. Maybe
all that collective consciousness moon-dancing goddess obeisance creative visualization
stuff really works afterall...or we can just thank Steve Sears again. As season five winds down and limps away into the sunset, even LL and ROC themselves, sadly at long last, seem to have given up and abandoned their characters along with any hope of a 'good' script, abetted by the ousted production team who seemed blissfully unaware of anything that transpired in seasons one through four. Now compare with the almost preternatural steadfastness displayed by Mistress Good. She has never not been oh so true to them for one blessed moment. That is why her X&G, based on the truth of the originals created and nurtured by LL & ROC (prior to this sorry season at least), have even supplanted the current screen incarnations in many fans' affections. The alpha wolf pads lightly onward. If LL and ROC can remember what their once powerful chemistry felt like and recapture it through Missy's words that would be magickal alchemy indeed. Our gratitude to her is immense. ¨ |
2) Lowered Expectations Training
| Lady Adrell May 25, 2000 |
| Welcome to the first LE Training article. I will be talking about how Lowered Expectations can improve your X:WP watching enjoyment. Let's take it from the top and work our way down low! XWP started out a superb show. It was original in its conception and had excellent writing. The acting at first was pretty good and only got better as did the episodes. The chatty sidekick Gabrielle was not loved by all but she threw in an element of the friend and strong link in the chain that Xena needed to keep on track, and soon became beloved by many, like myself <drool>. We will start off your Lowered Expectations Training by learning how to rate the |
| episodes in Season 5. This is important because the scales change dramatically. They dumb down the episodes, we have to dumb down our thoughts in order to enjoy them. |
| Now comparing the
first four seasons to this last season (Season 5), we have to remember that in order to
continue watching our thinking has to be changed. Forget all the past seasons. Season 5 is
the Lowered Expectations Season! There is a NEW scale to be used. I usually rate the
episodes on a scale from 1 to 10 (modeled after the Rate-A-Xena Website) where 1 is the worst
and 10 is the best. During seasons 1-4, I used the X:WP Expectations Rating System or the
Normal Rating Scale. I expect the best from the show that is kick ass! Episodes such as Is
There A Doctor In The House, Return of Callisto, A Good Day, and The
Quest, I would give a 10. Whereas episodes like Chariots of War, The
Dirty Half Dozen, and Ulysses I'd give lower ratings of 5's and 6's. Though
good episodes, not of the same caliber as those mentioned before them. The Lowered Expectations Rating Scale for Season 5 is a totally different rating scale. Taking into account that a few of the first episodes Fallen Angel through Succession I consider Season 4 eps. The reason being that these episodes would kill the curve of the LE Rating Scale and were superior eps than the rest of Season 5. They get rated by the Normal Rating Scale. Let's start with the first episode that comes to my mind, Punch Lines. I'd rate this episode to be about a 7 on the LE Rating Scale. It was funny, had pies being thrown, a miniature Gabby and Argo, heavy with jokes about Xena's moodiness, and Joxer in the bulk of the episode. Amphipolis Under Siege was a great episode which got a solid 9 on the LE Rating Scale. It had a new Goddess,we saw a battle with Gab in the lead, Xena being kick ass |
| and minus the baby, Ares, and no Joxer.
For you Joxer fans out there, this is not a bash to him, just how I rate the eps. Your LE
Rating Scale could be different from mine. I'm just giving the basic elements for the LE
Rating Scale. I'll add this for the curious. What would I rate those eps on the Normal Rating Scale? Punch Lines. Would have gotten a 4. For most of the reasons that I stated for the LE Rating Scale. The pies were over done, Gab in miniature was not appealing, the lack of faith in Gab by Xena was old news and dealt with in Seasons 2 and 3, TOO much Joxer, no closeness from the girls, and there was a pie fight! Amphipolis Under Siege would have gotten about a 7. |
| It had some really
good elements with Ares and Athena, Gab leading an army again, Xena manipulating Ares
again, no baby in tow, Xena in her old leathers, and we got to see some resemblance of the
X:WP that we all came to love minus the good characterization of Gab who was a killer and
nothing else in this whole season practically. For the record, Married With Fishsticks rates a minus 10 (off the chart entirely; not even a real Xena ep) on the Normal Rating Scale and a 1 on the LE Rating Scale. That episode just SUCKS no matter how low your expectations get. Now you could argue that it should have rated high on the LE Rating Scale because of the comedy and the heavy slapstick, but I really hate this ep and no matter how low my expectations go, this one does not live up to any thing remotely X:WP. Only cool thing about that ep was Gab punching Joxer and Gab licking that lolly pop! That's it for now. I hope that you can come up with your own LE Rating Scale based on what you do or do not expect from X:WP in Season 5 and possibly Season 6 as well. But always remember, aim low and you'll always hit your mark! ¨ DISCLAIMER: This section is done in fun with heavy sarcasm because that is the only way I can continue to watch the show that I used to really enjoy. I've lost my faith and have lowered my expectations and wanted to share with you in a funny way how I go on being a Xenite. Long live fanfic!!!!!!!!! |
3) Xena Quote/Dar & Kerry Joke
Xena Quote
Gabrielle: "Looks like you got your daughter
back."
Xena: "No, we got 'our' daughter back."-- Too little, too late? from Motherhood
Dar & Kerry Joke
How to tell you're addicted to D & K
You're flipping through your March Cable Guide and at least every other movie
reminds you of Dar and Kerry...
All the Right Moves (mmmm, Dar <eg>)
Always (lots of mush)
Analyze This (can't you hear Dar saying that?)
And You Thought Your Parents Were Weird (starring Kerry's parents)
Anything Goes (um, the leather store)
Around the World in 80 Days (D&K finally take that long vacation)
At First Sight (ah, love)
The Baby Dance (some pups get their wish -- D&K with a baby)
Beach Party (the commitment ceremony)
Belly (ah, lets not go there <bg>)
The Bermuda Triangle (dinner and the first kiss)
Better Off Dead (Steve... Ankow...)
Big Girls Don't Cry... They Get Even (Dar's motto?)
The Bikini Car Wash (um, instead of cleaning up a school, this is next year's EDS charity
fund raiser <bg>)
Blow Out (hospital bomb)
Body Heat (cough, cough, maybe I better stop now, I can hear the go there bus honking out
front...) ;-) ;-)
[editor's note: previously posted to the pack by Tovie]
4) Featured Fan Fiction
Conqueror
By Catherine Wilson
Review by Cated: Ever wonder what would happen if Xena and Gabrielle had met during Xena's days as a warlord? Step into the mind of the warlord as she meets a mysterious peasant girl who breaks down her walls and walks into her heart.
Warning: This story is rated R for some sexual content. Please be aware if you plan to read this piece.
I give Conqueror *****!
http://www.tsoft.com/~cmwilson/Stories/Conqueror.html
Campfire Chat 1: Embers to Flame
By: A.L. Dunham
Review by Cated: For all you X-G romantics out there, this relatively short piece finds Xena and Gabrielle revealing their true feelings for each other. Very sweet!
Warning: This story is rated R for sexual content. There is a sex scene, but it's not too graphic. Please proceed with caution.
I give Campfire Chat 1:
Embers to Flame ****!
http://www.geocities.com/~rensnce/embersto.htm
| Star Rating |
| ***** | A must read if you are a Hard Core Nutball! |
| **** | It is worth your while to read. |
| *** | It's better than getting punched in the face by Xena. |
| ** | Maybe a go-round with Xena isn't a bad idea.. |
| * | Shoot me...shoot me now! |
5) Xena News
| Australia's Channel 10 Pulls XWP
Once Again Lady Adrell May 25, 2000 |
| Australian Xenites are
once again suffering from XWP withdrawals. After a tough fight to get Xena back on the air
in Australia, Channel 10,which pulled the show during the fourth season, has once again
pulled the show just before the Season 4 finale The Ides of March. Australian
Xenites are once again battling for their beloved show. Channel 10 originally pulled the show back in May of 1999, due to lack of viewer support. Because of viewer protest and a movement by Xenites to get the show back on the air in Australia, three months after pulling Xena, Channel 10 began airing the show again |
| in August of 1999. Two episodes were aired with no news to fans that it was going to be back and when they could catch it. Hence, the show was pulled again. Some feedback from the station states that "it will return at a later date" or that "it's a kiddies show and only kids from 5 - 13 years watch it," as well as it was pulled because of "lack of viewer support." Despite the many e-mails, phone calls, faxes, and snail |
| mails sent to the station about airing the
show again there is no sign that Xena will be aired again any time soon. Aussie Xenites would like help from us fans around the world to help them to once again persuade Channel 10 to start airing Xena. Let's do what we can to help them. Everyone deserves a chance to watch Xena. Show your support by going to Channel 10's message board (found at the bottom of this section) and tell them you want Xena back on the air. If for nothing else, do it for your Xenite brothers and sisters who desperately want to watch the Warrior Princess in action again. ¨ |
Channel 10's Message Board: http://203.147.194.81/webCh10/admin/SwitchedOn/bbs/bbs/message_display.asp?topic_id=111&b1=98&b2=109&PromotionID=637-
6) Featured Xena Site
Merewolf's Cave
http://www.merwolf.com/ (The complete works of
Melissa Good) Need we say more?
7) Episode/Subtext Guide
Episode Four Cradle of Hope and Episode Five The
Path Not Taken
Cradle of Hope
What is this John Hughes inspired obsession with baby tossing? Confined to only this
ep that particular bit of slapstick would not have worn out its dubious welcome. But we
like it better when Xena treats the sleazy would-be lothario to a taste of tough love W.P.
style...the over the shoulder sucker punch...without another thought or backward glance.
So much for having a soft spot for bad boys. This ep mixes fairy tale elements with the
cautionary myth of Pandora's box and is a diverting hour. The baby in the rushes. Pandora
retold and rehabilitated. Even Hope is gone... X&G are still trying to define their
relationship; not a sister thing exactly, no...traveling companions, friends, is Gab her
'ward' like Robin to Batman?...uh, no, that's not it. At the end it is very touching of
Xena to ask they name the baby Gabriel for Gab. It gives us a very good idea of Xena's
growing affection for the kid. Gab is so heartbreakingly, sweetly innocent and enchanting.
Xena is so wise, and yet Gab will teach her so much. The marriage of opposites. The
marriage of true minds. No impediment.
Subtext rating: Short and sweet (like Gab) and slightly sassy...uh, significant.
The Path Not Taken
I was delighted when I saw the inter-racial aspect here handled so well--or, really,
not 'handled' at all, but completely taken for granted. Made me think this boded well for
a series that would not, then, stand back to portray other types of adult relationships.
When I was growing up, tv's first inter-racial kiss ("Star Trek") caused a furor
among benighted conservative souls--just as any hint of gay love continues to provoke
today.
Subtext rating: X&G are separated through much of the ep, so it's nil, except...Xena's definition re ex-lover Marcus as "my friend" is interesting though, no? in relation to her 'best friend' status with Gabrielle. [Note: I can find subtext in every ep even if I have to scan with an electron microscope...with the exception of that dreadful Gabless 'comic' ep (another baby tossing ep, appropriately nicknamed the "stinky" show) that doesn't even mention (not even by the supposedly besotted Joxer!) our Bard, what a dis.]
8) Feedback (some VERY special feedback that touched us deeply)
Comments on the Steve Sears Issue
The Man Himself Responds: (reprinted by permission; thanks Steve)
"Oh.........
My.........
Goddess.......
I am absolutely speechless. And petrified that anything I say or write in response to what
you've all written would make me look like a complete and utter nimknull. Wow. I am
absolutely overwhelmed. Please make sure everyone involved knows how much this affected
me.
Now, imagine a campfire burning quietly next to a rolled out blanket. Two familiar figures sit nearby; one, the smaller one, sits up on a log. The other slouches against a treetrunk, next to the bedroll. The nightis silent with the exception of:
"I can't explain it, Xena. This feeling... I want to explain it, but I'm having a problem with the words. I mean, I'm overwhelmed by it. I can't help thinking that the words are there, just floating around me, like little treasures on the wind... but is it that I can't catch them... or I won't? Maybe that's it. Maybe I'm afraid that I'll be able to touch the words... understand them... but then never be able to use them. You know? Why is it I feel as if the major part of who I am is right there, like those little words, trying to speak to me... and yet, waiting for me to call them by name. And every night... before I fall asleep... I can only wonder... no, hope that they will still be there in the morning. Do you understand what I'm trying to say, Xena?"
"Those aren't words, Gabrielle. They're feelings. And feelings should never have a name. Once they do, people find a way to turn them into a curse. Now, come to bed and sleep. I'll make sure those little treasures don't leave you during the night. Or ever."
I never wrote this scene before. I hope it still finds a place now. Take care, everyone. And thank you beyond expression."
steve
Readers' Feedback: (Thank you Cindy, Sue, Brian and Jan!!! for responding to our tribute to Steve and to an advance copy of his reply.)
Cindy writes:
The Software Side of Sears... "Ladies, you do yourselves proud. Yet another wonderfully complete, amazingly insightful issue of your e-xine. The feature editorial by bacchae2 offers her trademark arrow straight to the heart of the Steve Sears legacy (if I may be permitted to make shameless use of the word which will henceforth be a verbal talisman in the xenaverse). She paddles through the chronological airings, oar tips skimming the subtext without muddying the waters unnecessarily. I was going to quote a passage here, but found myself unable to decide on just one...and I suppose just lifting the entire essay would be a little redundant!
"LadyA gives a well-deserved pat on the back to our honoree which made me reflect on how it would feel to be Mr. Sears and have such an issue chock full of kudos delivered to one's virtual mailbox. (A little chest expansion is certainly a valid (and well-deserved) response if you're listening, Steve.)... Darlings, this issue was not just hot, but positively Searing!!! <eep...gotta forgive me that one>"
Brian writes:
"What a wonderful thing to do, to devote a whole Xine to the talented, perceptive, and much missed Steve Sears. Both your articles were beautiful, heartfelt, thoughtful homages to Steve, and I agree with everything you said about him. I loved the review of Dreamworker too, and how it was tied into Steve's The Deliverer and A Good Day episodes. Of all the writers on Xena, he truly did have the best grasp of the characters and love story, I think, and the integrity to really care about the show, the characters, thier relationship, and substantive storytelling of the highest calibre.
"The beautiful Xena/Gabrielle scene he wrote in response to this Xine nearly made me cry. To evoke this reaction from the man.....extraordinary......and you both deserve every bit of praise he sent you. Thanks so much for such a first rate tribute to my own personal behind the scenes hero at XWP.
"And what a kind thing to do to encourage people to give his Sheena series a try. I too think it will be a lot better than many people probably expect. If you asked me which show will be better next season, the 6th season of XWP, or the first season of Sheena, I'd place my bets on the latter."
Jan writes:
"Wow. He is something awesome. :) I was totally amazed by this guy. He just can't be real, but then having seen some of his shows, I guess he is. But his letter was a tribute to the e-xines tribute to him!! What an awesome thing."
Sue writes:
"Well, now I'm gonna' give my impressions...feeble as they are after what Mr. Tyldus did. So cool!
"Anyway, this xine really made me smile! You guys managed to thank him without embarrassing yourselves. I've been cringing...a bit over all the gifts and whatnots...fans have been showering upon Steve. The pure prostration of these acts seemed...over the top. But, this xine issue is just the kind of proper thank-you that he obviously appreciates. It showed more heart and honest feeling than all the tons of chocolate, flowers and other gifts combined. He undoubtedly happily welcomed the acknowledgement of his hard work rather than just more kudos for his hand in Missy's hiring. I've been aware of Steve's hand in Xena, of course, but the passion you bought to showing how invaluable he was in making Xena great was something of an education for me. You managed to put all of the pieces in place like a puzzle and made me, at least, understand that the real, and now undeniable, reason we've lost our show is because we lost Steve. Great job!"
One of your editors writes:
"I'm still on a high from this. What a cool thing! I love Steve. I want to have his children! <wink>"
[Ed. note: not naming any names here, but we both feel that way...and that's saying quite a lot!]
If you have any comments, suggestions for content, or
articles to submit to this Xine, then please contact Lady Adrell at exine@exine.tvheaven.com
(We are accepting submissions for featured articles. Send to above address.)
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9) PRIVACY/NO SPAM POLICY!
NO SPAMMING OR LIST SHARING!
You can rest assured that your subscription email address will be kept in the strictest
confidence. We do not divulge, nor make available to any third party, our subscription
list. Your privacy is paramount to us! Therefore, it receives the respect it deserves!
10) Subscribe/Unsubscribe Information
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11) Credits
The Xena E-Xine Staff:
Chief Editor/Head Reporter/Writer: Lady Adrell
Editor/Head Writer: Bacchae2
Assistant Editor: Cindy
FanFic Critic: Cated
Website Analyst: Staff
Episode Guides: Bacchae2
12) Archives
To read previous articles, please go to http://exine.tvheaven.com/archive.html
No XWP screenwriters lost their jobs as a result of our publishing the wonderful snippet from Steve Sears (darn it!).
You have permission to forward this to other people, and by all means, please do.
All imagines of Xena: Warrior Princess are © Copyright and Trademarks of MCA Universal, Renaissance Pictures, and Studio USA. All rights reserved.
Pictures of Lucy Lawless and Reneé O'Conner from Soundwarrior's WebPage.
The contents of this E-Xine may be copied, reproduced,
or freely distributed for all nonprofit purposes without the consent of the author as long
as the author's name and contact information are included, unless where otherwise stated.
Example: Reproduced with permission from Lady Adrell or said author.
All contents Copyright © 2000 The Xena E-Xine, except where indicated otherwise. All
rights reserved worldwide. All trademarks are the property of their respective owners.
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